Conversations

I've heard it said that great conversation is an art form; much more than mere language, it encompasses articulate expression, careful listening, keen attention, and a sharp self-awareness paired with other-centered perception. That's perhaps an elaborate introduction to my meditations upon a weekend filled with a thrilling variety of conversations that renewed my wonder at the staggering breadth of human experience, and the blessing of getting a sense of someone else's life by listening to his or her stories.

On Saturday morning I interviewed a number of local high school seniors who have applied to Dartmouth College; it's my fifth consecutive year helping my local alumni chapter's efforts to offer interviews to applicants. In the course of four conversations lasting roughly 30 minutes each, I was intrigued by each student's accounts of his or her academic accomplishments, extracurricular pursuits, and other distinguishing attributes. Even more, though, I was struck by how, at some point in the conversation, each student made the transition from speaking about himself or herself to speaking as himself or herself. To experience a deeper revelation of someone's character, whether in an account about immersion in another culture, a broken family reuniting around the death of a loved one, or a personal transformation from shyness to self-confidence, filled me with wonder at the richness of each young man or woman with whom I had the pleasure of speaking. In subsequently writing my reports for the admissions department, I naturally made reference to some of the specifics of our conversations, but also strove to express the depth of character that I encountered in each applicant.

That same evening, I traveled to Providence to visit a Dartmouth classmate with whom I had recently reestablished contact. Having had little communication since commencement six and a half years ago, we had much to discuss as we exchanged stories of travels, adventures, career decisions, and news of mutual friends and acquaintances. There was rarely a silent moment in the hours we spent at a Thai restaurant, a local pub, a quaint apartment, and strolling the snowbound streets of the fair capital of Rhode Island. During my drive home at the end of the night, my reflections and memories echoed with the blessing of a rich encounter, an ability to hear and be heard as I am, and to celebrate the beginning of a new chapter of a friendship, one of many sprung from the shared experience of spending four years at one of the finest colleges in New England.

It's time for me to join another regular round of conversation, the social in which Jesuit communities engage before the evening meal. It's an opportunity to step back from our busy lives of apostolic service and personal prayer to celebrate and enrich the bonds of fraternal friendship that warm our homes and extend beyond our walls. As a weekend draws to a close and a new week begins, I pray that we may all have the grace of rich, fulfilling conversations that allow us to not only encounter the brilliance of others, but better appreciate the treasure of our own selves.